Depression

Hi,I hate this thing,I'm on antidepressants,I'm divorce 3grow up kids,I live alone and I hate it,I hate being in my house ,I push myself everyday to be motivated,I find my thinking is very slow and I forget things,I'm just sick of everything,I have 3 grand kids.1 lives out of town,2 live close to me,I feel I'm an embarassement to be like this and I feel people ignore me,because of my depression etc..I live in a small town and everyone knows everything,I don't know what to do,the more I'm out of this house the better.

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